Railway Adventures Gifts

Two men arguing on a train journey

'We deeply regret to have to inform you that no train will be late today. You even have the chance to get a clean seat. Please accept our apologies. Thank you for your understanding.'

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

Replacement Bus Spotters.

'Have you been waiting long?'

"'COST: shedloads, COMPLETION DATE: God knows.' Perhaps you'd care to flesh out some details for us."

The next fast train has gone.

Sushi Train Spotters

HS2

Run from the hills!

An Appreciation

"Is this the Canterbury Train?"

'You can see the excuses in the news now, it will be 'The wrong sort of rain'!'

"Remember when they just used to write the train numbers down?"

HS2 time bomb...

L.A. Transfer

"We've been working all the live-long fiscal year to get these numbers up, but I'm afraid some of us are working just to pass the time away."

'We don't keep cash on the premises.'

The Train to Nowhere

A train's dining car is a diner.

'Arrivals and Departures - this railroad governed by Heisenberg's uncertainty principle'

Isambard Kingdom Brunel.

'I know it's harrowing and distressing, but please Mr. Benson, tell me again about your daily train journey to work.'

"Please mind the gap between the train timetable and reality."

What Holds the Subway Together?

'Sorry, but I had trouble with train story-problems in math, when I was a kid too.'

"I'm ringing you because there's nobody in the carriage to annoy..."

"Conjoined twins were born in a bed on a passenger train. They were separated at berth."

"Kevin's job as a train announcer seriously affected his love-life..."

'It will bring economic benefits to the North and Midlands.'

Pound sign on rail tracks.

The light rail system is reaching the downtown business core too quickly!

"I'd love to talk. I'm on a train!"

"Ok, get the 09:30 to Manchester... change for the 11:25 to Preston.. then catch the 12:15..."

"There's a red light at the end of the tunnel."