Raffle Enthusiasts Gifts

'Alzheimers Society Raffle' "You won't forget to make the draw will you?"

Hacking through ice in order to fish

Kid to fellow fisherman: 'Why do they stink like fish when they've been bathing this whole time?'

'I can't figure out why I keep getting wind knots.'

'I imagine you'd like to hear about my progress...'

Shore fishing requires threading the needle.

Man indignant at having caught no fish

Four fishermen catch the same fish.

'My resume,...in rap form!'

My Musical Influences

'Hold on to this ticket. Immediately after armageddon, there'll be a drawing for door prizes!'

A Message from Your Fishing Buddies.

"My dad was a prize-winning bull too: According to Mum, he won a raffle once at the local fair..."

'When an outboard goes overboard'

'Suddenly Jake was confronted by the dreaded raffler'

Michel de Montaigne

Man in a raft with a balloon animal.

Do not take fish by unathourized means.

"Nothing says 'Teacher Appreciation' like an administrator winning the raffle."

'It's so ironic: I finally win a prize at a raffle and it has to be a free pedicure!'

"Since when did my opinions become 'riffs'?"

Coarse Fishing.

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Fishing.

"It all started out just fetching sticks, and the business sort of grew from there."

"Guess who won the meat tray raffle?"

'Nothing is biting, let's take a lunch break on that island.'

'Ken's back was bent at a rakish angle'

'I believe you want some fencing done at the bottom of your garden?'

"Some guys have better rafts than Steve... and friends... and jobs... and ears that don't always ring, but no one's got a better attitude."

'Quick! sell me a lure,any lure,I just found an empty compartment in my tackle box.'

Pinocchio on a date: "Before this goes any further, you should know that I've got fungal rot."

'What's it this time?'

"This is my crab!"

"I'm sorry, John, I don't think I'll ever understand the thrill of spending $20 of bait to catch $5 of fish!"