Race Day Indulger Gifts

'Marathon...? what Marathon...!'

A day at the races

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

'Now will you pull over and ask for directions?'

Smile

'It's supposed to look and smell greasy.'

First past the post.

"Did you see neighhhhhh...bours last night?"

'He's known as the hardest-driving track coach in the country.'

-Psst! Back me in the 4:30! -Oh! -Surprised I can talk, huh? -No, surprised you think you can win!

Bradley Wiggins

Loser's Podium.

'Ptuwah! This is tap water!'

1st Place in the Egg and Spoon Race

"Howard's gone on the Tour de France without his bicycle again."

Race Horses See Big People.

'Ere Bert, what do I do with a lady who wants an each way bet on the boat race?'

'It's no use ... I'll never catch anyone. I can't even catch my breath.'

"It's only a 2-k race, but in the 10 years we've sponsored it, nobody's ever finished."

'I hear the meeting was cancelled last Saturday.' - 'Yeah. Someone drugged the hare.'

The Tortoise and NASCAR.

Only horse I know that likes to start out of the crouch. 6 3.

'I plucked myself. It reduces drag in the water.'

'It happens to a lot of runners at this stage of the marathon, George. It;s called 'hitting the wall'...'

Hurdles with Steps

"I can't believe we forgot to pack the car."

'Ha! Fake out!'

'When I'm in the saddle I'm part of the horse.' - 'Yes, but which part?'

Formula One eco helmet

The Royal Enclosure!

"Hi, Mum, I'm last in the race, but I do have the best mobile."

Oxford-Cambridge Boat Race,1870-The Crews Approach Putney Bridge

Jed was a serious gamer...so on race days, he would always dress for speed!!