Quirky Teacher Gifts

'Home Schooling'

A teacher sits in front of a blackboard that advertises various school subjects as being for sale.

'Dad demonstrates for an hour and then we go home - what happens in your swimming lessons?'

'Well Watson junior you seem to be in your element.'

'They canceled school today -- the teacher couldn't find her hand puppets.'

'Think Basics.'

"How can you be failing history?"

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

'This test doesn't understand me.'

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

"Today in class we're going to create a physics teacher."

Subatomic particles

Empty Headed Schoolboy

"If find people express themslves more freely in traffic jams."

"I didn't raise my hand. I was just stretching."

"Do you have any bedtime stories that aren't about the former Yugoslavia?"

Benjamin Franklin

Essay Paper.

When scientists come out of retirement.

'It actually stands for 'substitute' but it keeps the children in line.'

A Wally Yomp Psychologist...Practice limited to people who are really miffed!

Physics 101. An object in motion remaining in motion is an example of what law? Easy come, easy go!

'Well, I guess a master's degree is a master's degree, even if it is in skateboarding.'

"I give all new teachers the same advice. First you have to get the attention of the class. Can you quack like a duck or juggle two books in the air?"

'Today's lesson - how to slam a door.'

Keep students on their toes...

The institute.

'Today in Tactile Effusions Class we are going to pop the bubbles in this packing material.'

'Do you have to explain nutrition with a pie chart?'

"The big boot Italy ain't gonna kick the small shoe Sicily no more, capiche?"

'They're both great quarterbacks, but I chose Matt as my starter because he's dating a celebrity!'

"I'm deleting history so there will be nothing to study for tomorrow's history test."

"...then - and here's the funny part - I add the potassium sulfate..."