Quirky Classroom Enthusiast Gifts

'A sinkhole ate my homework...?'

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

'Home Schooling'

'Thank you for the apple Conrad. But in answer to your question, no, you may not address me as 'Boopsie'.'

"Today in class we're going to create a physics teacher."

'I guess what happens in Kindergarten, doesn't stay in Kindergarten.'

"How was first grade? I don't know yet. I spent all day in the Principal's office."

Global Education

'Dad demonstrates for an hour and then we go home - what happens in your swimming lessons?'

Benjamin Franklin

Beginning of the school year

'Think Basics.'

"Fear not, Miss Hathaway. Just go home and listen to a cd of howling wolves or screeching monkeys and by Monday you'll be ready for your 3rd grade class."

It could be worse -- there could be 35 teachers for every student

"I give all new teachers the same advice. First you have to get the attention of the class. Can you quack like a duck or juggle two books in the air?"

'Today's lesson - how to slam a door.'

'You always go that extra mile, don't you Molly.'

School boy

"No, you don't get incentive pay for Billy Vincent."

"The kindergarteners have breached their classroom confines, and are headed this way. We'll be overrun within minutes. What should we do?"

"I noticed he had punched air holes in his desk. Now I'm afraid to open it."

"The big boot Italy ain't gonna kick the small shoe Sicily no more, capiche?"

'Do you have to explain nutrition with a pie chart?'

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

There were occasional moments when she questioned her decision to work with truly gifted students.

"People...do you FINALLY understand the concept of 'Visual Narrative?'"

Announcement over school PA: 'We're going to begin this week with an all-school search for Mr. Ridley - last Friday's substitute teacher.'

A small clown sits at the back of a class room - 'Mr Jenkins, do you always have to be the class clown?!'

'Sir, one question... When will we know if we've run-out of invisible ink?'

'They canceled school today -- the teacher couldn't find her hand puppets.'

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN!, 'It was neat! - they have flat-screen blackboards!'