Quirky Humor Lover Pillows

"He's 104. He always comes back on his birthday - I worked out he'd be gone at 69."

Andy Oxidant meets Free Radical.

IQ test for birds.

'Do you want to hear my new ring tone?'

Solicitor tells cats: 'It's unorthodox, I know, but old Mrs Featherstone has left her entire estate to her immediate family.'

I will not get within 6 feet of others."

"Hello. My name is Maury, and I'm going to be your crazy person today."

Customer Services - Ten complaints or less.

Data analysts realize their smart building has OCD.

'Now remember, he spent $400 on that, so no matter what, we can never play with it.'

"It's no disgrace - somebody has to be plain vanilla."

Caveman tries to carve using a pencil.

Designer Eye Tests - "Times new Roman, Garamond, Courier, Comic Sans, and Arial."

"I chose style over comfort."

Archer draws target around arrow

"This is the only product claim that legal would allow."

'No, not disappointed - I think I just hadn't realised the meaning of the term kitchen island.'

'We will KILL whoever did this!'

'This is one of our best-selling contacts. Price includes artificial twinkle.'

"Come back when you have a girlfriend with a shorter name"

Teacher - 'Good morning pupils!' Children - 'Good morrrrrning Miss Iris!'

And then one day it happened: form, which always follows Function, crosses the line into outright stalking.

Descartes in the afterlife: "I thought therefore I was."

Oil Derrick Crop

Mrs. Hanover would soon eat her words.

'How much gin will I need for three medium size lemons?'

Little man under a microscope with binoculars.

Santa Claus standing and posing with a group of misfit reindeer.

'I finally kicked the fire breathing habit, now I'm stuck on mints and I'm gaining weight.'

"I swear, if someone told me ten years ago I'd be sitting naked on a tree limb talking to a can of peaches in syrup, I'd have said they were crazy."

Elephant & Sheik

'I'm all ears.'

"I don't need to write it down, boss, I'm wearing a wire."

Pavlov's dog (under a bell).

'You meowin' at me?'