Quirky Hotel Fan Gifts

"Hotel UFO! Yes - that's right our dining room opens at 5 and closes at 5:15!"

'RUN FOR COVER!!!!! It's another one of those 'Baby Showers'!!!

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

Open House of Horrors

Would you make up your mind? I can't keep letting you in and out all day.

"Sometimes, Cheryl, I wonder why you only invite me along to cocktail parties."

Four olives and a toothpick on Newton's Cradle.

Antler Buzzers.

"Trust me. This is going to make it easier to discuss your childhood."

Deer Cross Dressing.

The water desk

"We're out of flowers."

"Do you have a family history of this condition?"

'I think they make my feet look too small.'

Beachy Hair

Crossword bathroom tiles.

Cat gets caught eating the cuckoo from a cuckoo clock.

'Extreme acupuncture.'

'Bloomin rare breeds.'

'Let's face it, we're not meant to wear hats...'

"... Wine list? No, we don't have a wine list! Perhaps I can get sir something from the vending machine?"

"Yes, it is strange...usually he reads the 'Daily Gossip'."

The Booger.

'A Dust Cow'.

"Love the exposed chessboard."

"Hock pa-tooie. Hock pa-tooie. Hock pa-tooie."

Three ducks: two have normal bills, third one has bill turned around like bill of cap.

The hand sanitiser had all gone but I managed to get one of these

'We only have rooms with real teeth left!'

'-and she gets headaches every time the doorbell plays our tune.'

"Fruit of the Loon"

5 foot high or less aisle in a supermarket

'We didn't know what to do with all our old, outdated equipment, so we made a sculpture garden from it.'

Emma's Bridal Wear: Gowns Veils Trains