Quirky Greetings Fan Gifts

Instant Cash Machine: Choose Your Own Transaction Sign-Off

'RUN FOR COVER!!!!! It's another one of those 'Baby Showers'!!!

Happy Easter

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

The Age of Reptiles. . .

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

Oh yeh? Well at least he doesn't get fleas.

Open House of Horrors

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

"Sometimes, Cheryl, I wonder why you only invite me along to cocktail parties."

Four olives and a toothpick on Newton's Cradle.

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

Wind turbine and leaf blower.

Antler Buzzers.

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

Never give a cow a giant straw.

The awkwardness of one's first officeplace fist-bump.

'You should work for Conglomo. You're allowed the vegetable of your choice.'

'I mean, what sort of thief only takes a dog bowl?'

"And you wanted to throw me back."

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

"We're out of flowers."

Beachy Hair

"He's at that awkward age."

French Animal Noises.

'We only have one brand of beer, but we've got six kinds of flavor straws.'

'I think they make my feet look too small.'

Toast kidnapper.

Crossword bathroom tiles.