Quirky Dining Experience Seeker T-Shirts

All our meals digest easily forming a soft, mushy stool with just a hint of acridity.

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

Reserved space is reserved for a dinner table.

Pick Your Own Baby Lamb Chop

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

"Give him his food."

'Can I get a box for this?'

"Can I have a doggie bag to go?"

Sushi Train Spotters

'How d'you want your eggs - down your pants, over your head...?'

"No, we don't have field to plate provenance for each bean."

'Would you care for a drink while your food is being defrosted?'

"I can highly recommend the peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich, served with a chilled glass of milk."

'We don't bring you anything. That's the surprise part.'

Fast Food Restaurant

"The catch of the day is halibut. The day it was caught was last Tuesday."

"We only do salads. There's no need to keep warning customers that the plates are cold."

Our Troubled Chowders

Food inspection results

Suddenly Harold froze, trying to remember if he had ordered a side of roaches, or if this was a gross violation of public healthcare policy.

"Please be advised that our new chef's policy is that you're not allowed to leave until you've finished all the food on your plate."

'Who ordered the chef's head?'

"I'll have the chef."

Salad Hat

"We have sparkling and still, but I'll have to ask if we have black."

How To Turn A Closed-Down Nuclear Reactor Into A Theme Restaurant: A Master Plan.

"Start Sucking!"

"Waiter! Waiter! There's no flies in my soup!"

"You're the one who wanted to go someplace off the beaten track - you ask him what's gluten free."

Todays Special: Beans on Toast #2.50 (use of tin-opener 10- extra. . .)

"My name's Aldred and I'll be your server this evening."

I recommend the ketchup.

Spaceman serving shrimp.