Quirky Dining Lover T-Shirts

'How d'you want your eggs - down your pants, over your head...?'

Fast Food Restaurant

Todays Special: Beans on Toast #2.50 (use of tin-opener 10- extra. . .)

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

Reserved space is reserved for a dinner table.

"Who ordered the moose en croute?"

Kentucky Fried Horse

Tzatzikicicle

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

"So, I went into this fancy new butcher shop and they were selling ostrich of all things!"

"Give him his food."

Sushi Train Spotters

"Can I have a doggie bag to go?"

"It's a combination of pizza and sushi and taco and egg roll and...it's just something everyone loves."

'I don't eat red meat. That's ok, this is gone green.'

'Would you care for a drink while your food is being defrosted?'

"I can highly recommend the peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich, served with a chilled glass of milk."

Roadkill Restaurant

Our Troubled Chowders

"No, we don't have field to plate provenance for each bean."

"The insect menu is very popular nowadays."

'What on earth is this? Hedgehog soup.'

De ja vu soup - 'It was yesterday's 'soup of the day'.'

"Is everything all right? Any reactions to the irradiated carrots, the transgenic tomatoes, or the antibiotics in the chicken?"

"We only do salads. There's no need to keep warning customers that the plates are cold."

'Shall I bring two children's meals, or will Madam regurgitate her own?'

Food inspection results

"The catch of the day is halibut. The day it was caught was last Tuesday."

Suddenly Harold froze, trying to remember if he had ordered a side of roaches, or if this was a gross violation of public healthcare policy.

"Nice going, Larry. They're going in after your liverwurst and sardine sandwich that fell behind the fridge last month."

"We have sparkling and still, but I'll have to ask if we have black."

'Who ordered the chef's head?'