Quirky Dining Enthusiasts T-Shirts

Reserved space is reserved for a dinner table.

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

"All our vegetables are organic, ethically sourced and stunned before being boiled."

Kentucky Fried Horse

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

"So, I went into this fancy new butcher shop and they were selling ostrich of all things!"

"It's a combination of pizza and sushi and taco and egg roll and...it's just something everyone loves."

"Can I have a doggie bag to go?"

Sushi Train Spotters

"Give him his food."

'Can I get a box for this?'

'I don't eat red meat. That's ok, this is gone green.'

Food inspection results

Fast Food Restaurant

"The insect menu is very popular nowadays."

"Is everything all right? Any reactions to the irradiated carrots, the transgenic tomatoes, or the antibiotics in the chicken?"

"No, we don't have field to plate provenance for each bean."

"I can highly recommend the peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich, served with a chilled glass of milk."

Octopi a la mode.

"We only do salads. There's no need to keep warning customers that the plates are cold."

"The catch of the day is halibut. The day it was caught was last Tuesday."

Roadkill Restaurant

Our Troubled Chowders

'What on earth is this? Hedgehog soup.'

'How d'you want your eggs - down your pants, over your head...?'

"Nice going, Larry. They're going in after your liverwurst and sardine sandwich that fell behind the fridge last month."

Suddenly Harold froze, trying to remember if he had ordered a side of roaches, or if this was a gross violation of public healthcare policy.

'Who ordered the chef's head?'

"We have sparkling and still, but I'll have to ask if we have black."

"Please be advised that our new chef's policy is that you're not allowed to leave until you've finished all the food on your plate."

"And for your entree, sir?"

What can I get you? Coffee? Tea? Sandwich? The mackerel mocha sounds lovely. What's in it? The usual. Chocolate. Soy milk. Mackerel. Yes, but is the mackerel farm-raised or from the sea? Ocean. Atlantic? Pacific? Indian? Arctic? Antarctic? I'm not sure. Oh. Ok ... well what's the mackerel's mercury content? Negligible, I'm sure. Ok. Was it exposed to any chlorine? Or copper sulphate? Or malathion? Was it treated with kindness? Was it read stories and sung to before bedtime? Yes. Never mind, it s

Salad Hat

'O.K. Smarty Pants, here's your fish, cheese, egg, strawberry jam and pickle sandwich with a topping of ice cream and mustard. Pay up!'