Quirky Couple Jokers Pillows

Smokers under the mistletoe.

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

Children disturbing a heart rate reading.

'We have a beautiful relationship. Why spoil it with a hug?'

"O.K. I'm just feeding in your personal details for a suitable match..."

"I guess opposites do attract. She's a real shaker, and he's such a grind."

Advanced footsie

You got what you deserve … you deserve each other.

A couple dressed as a knife and a fork

'Why can't he just say 'I do'?'

Inappropriate Snowmen

"It was your idea to install the TV dish on the church spire"

'Don't blame me -- You're the one who had to have more personal space!'

A Prickly Pair

He was a nerd. But he was her nerd.

'Hot' and 'dog' t-shirts.

"So that's where you were last night."

'We met through a radiocarbon dating service.'

"Leon, do you think it's all psychological?"

"If she's a write off can you let me know the scrap value?"

'Sure, but will you still love me when I bite off your head and eat it?'

"Well, at first I didn't like him. But then his creepiness just grew on me."

Prison Romance.

"Don't tell him anything."

'He's narrating it, I just know it.'

'Here's one I made earlier.'

"What are you trying to tell me, girl? Are you hungry? You’re not hungry? The squirrels are skinny-dipping in the pool? Cats are making a hook rug out of your bed? You dug up Jimmy Hoffa?!" "Mitch liked messing with his dog's head."

'He has his pet and I have mine.'

"It's General Douglas MacArthur."

'Flowers? From a garage? You're a darling!'

'Who has the rings and prenup?'

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

'That's one of those May-December love affairs. He's 251 years old, and she can't be a day over 135!'