Quirky Comedy Lovers Gifts

"Although banned in 1948, the art of target holding is still practiced among some traditionalists."

I've lied to you...I don't really look like Angelina Jolie.

"She's possessed by the devil!"

Mobile crem

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"You left this on our ship."

Theatre Masks and Butts

"We have to take that science away from Tommy...he's genetically modified the cat!"

'Tiddles has left everything to an old folks' home.'

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

Blind man walking a tortoise.

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

"Fresh pepper?"

Scene from 'Night of the Koala'

Andy Oxidant meets Free Radical.

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

"Daddy is off to work in a data mine."

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

"No monsters, but there's a tear in the carpeting and I see hardwood!"

'So,,,apparently you're really a dude,'

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

'Can I have flies with that'

"Not tonight. The furniture is sentient again."

"Big n' tall" "Small n' long"

So You've Cloned Yourself

'It's a giant inkblot on loan from the psychiatrist who owns the unit next door.'

Fat Kid 14- Gets re-animated

Before they settled on water, shower pioneers experimented with a number of alternatives, including spaghetti,

'Well, somebody on this stupid little planet ordered an extra-large with pepperoni and mushrooms!'

"Barnes is morphing into some kind of strange creature. I warned him about eating out of the vending machines."

Sir Isaac Newton wondered how he couldexplain this! (Pineapple)

Cow Cong vs Toilet Rolls.

Toenail clipping missile.