Quirky Club Member Gifts

'As President of the Annoying Saying Society, just let me say,,,,,enjoy,'

Lurking Men's Club

'We play in the cat protection league.'

Potholing Club has pothole as entrance.

Girl Guided Missile

Pole Vaulting Club

"Rule one of Fart Club is everyone follows through in this Fart Club."

Niche Extracurriculars

Community Church. . . Back Rubs

Wasp appreciation society

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"I love you, you big fool."

'All I want for Valentine's Day is a Greek fisherman's cap.'

'I like scientists: They are genuinely interested in every mundane thing we do and keep detailed records...'

"Excuse me ma'am, may I help you cross the road so that I can get the answer to this dumb joke my friend keeps telling?"

Football Crazy strip six

"Albert is the first whistler to use hearing aid feedback as an intro to one of his tunes."

Are you interested in UFOs? Advanced life forms? Free medical screenings? Alternative underwear? Snacks and refreshments? Non-sexual turtles? Reverse pound cake? Science? Join us.

Giraffe Selfie

Penguin Remote

Celebrity Phrenologist.

"This does not make us friends."

"I've already made arrangements to be flushed down the toilet."

"Rob is a functioning train wreck."

Taking goldfish for a walk.

"I guess the point I'm trying to make is, calling the committee on Progress and Evolution a bunch of know-it-all nincompoops might have felt good when you said it, but..."

"And now, Bach's Brandenburg Concerto, Number One, first movement."

"Just pick one!! We're already late!!"

Annoying xylophone solicitors.

'Oh Gloria, I love you with all my heart, part of my liver and most of my lower intestine.'

"Sometimes Ben does very dumb things. I love that in him."

'What's wrong with you?'

Live Flower/Vase Flower - 'Julia?'

"My husband finally taught him to use the toilet but can't convince him to give up kitty litter."

If it's any consolation, you burned the bejeezus out of his finger.