Quirky Canine Enthusiast Gifts

"His mother was a poodle and his father was a shoe."

She's a Labrachihuashepoodle hound.

"Why can't you just dig things up like normal dogs?"

"What? Don't yuck my yum!"

"He was a dog person, I was a cat person, the answer was a ferret."

"Lap fish..."

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

Dog phrenology

Upper East Side Dog Park

Woman keeping a chicken in her room for fresh eggs

"And that's why you go on safari."

Henrietta was never one to conform to society's labels. She preferred to think of herself as an 'off-Rhode lsland Red'...

'He won't eat his lettuce until I've washed it five times. I'm sure his OCD is getting worse!'

"The first thing we have to do is get you up there."

"I did what you asked and got rid of my white mice."

"I guess people want dogs with no problems. Lucky for me, all I've got is quirks."

Priest with the Pet Devil.

'I want you to 'take him for a walk.''

The pet shop of Doctor Moreau

Cat on a psychiatrist's couch: 'Truth is, I'm not really a cat person.'

'It's about that lizard you sold me four months ago.'

Environmentally Sound Management of Biotechnology.

Croc feed machine contains chickens for feeding crocodiles at croc farm.

"If you'll excuse me fellas. I have to see a man about a dog. Specifically-this dog."

'Mutt is very insulting and definitely politically incorrect, but where do I find an animal rights attorney at this hour of the night?'

As years of unspoken tension surfaced, Trunky refused to raise his hand like a coward.

"Yeah, my great-grandpa was shell-shocked in World War One too..."

Fish in Water Cooler.

'Oh, that's Corky's way of saying hello.'

"Hi, I'm Miranda: I like sniffing bums, rolling about in dead things and chasing tennis balls. . ."

Joey tries to teach his pet rock how to swim.

'See what I mean, Doc?'

RING! RING! RING!: 'Not the cell phone AGAIN!'

"Oh, God, am I housebroken."