Quirky Buyer Gifts

"This model is priced higher, but it comes with glow-in-the-dark stars."

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

Unfinished Funiture Store.

Supermarket - World Cup Specials

Unusual Offers

"Okay, lets see what we have here."

Shampoo and Salad Dressing.

'Please enter your pin now.'

"I'd like these invested in an aggressive mutual fund."

'Triple-headed razors?... Aisle seven.'

Armstrong, the new Ybox game console comes out next week. I've got to get in line at Computer Villa. Nope. You are callous and inhumane. Fortunately, I have a backup plan. Computer Villa sale! If anyone cuts, chew their nose off.

"Okay, it if makes you feel better...yes, I have stock in a banana company."

The contract was not worth the paper it was written on, which considering the paper was not a good sign.

'In conclusion; our major contract expires tomorrow, we have no idea what we want, and no knowledge of the market, It is time to pass this across to the Procurement Team...'

"I'll trade you my cupcake for your head lice."

"The first thing we should do is get you two into a good mutual fund. Let me get out the 'Magic 8 Ball' and we'll fun some options."

"Does it come with magnets?"

"Hibernation - here I come..!"

Jumble Sale

(Direct to the Consumer)

Investments: We have locally grown stocks.

Animal worries.

Locally Grown Stocks, Farm Fresh CDs, Free Range Annuities.

The last of the Mom and Pop brokerage houses

"I LOVE you more than old people love to pay for everything in exact change."

"You should consider buying."

'That's Renfrew -- he's in charge of high-risk portfolios.'

Every Friday lunchtime procurement managers would gather to boast of the size of bid documents they had received that week.

Karen was delighted that both her large and small suppliers had turned up for her industry day

"Don't put your money into stocks. Bury it!"

'Gee, these are great, are they dishwasher proof?'