Quirky Borrower Gifts

'Could I have a loan of a cup of sugar please?'

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

A desert island with a knotted palm tree

Great British Eccentrics.

Bookstore, the Politically Incorrect Guide to You.

'This test doesn't understand me.'

Having been born with a birthmark that looks exactly like Asia and the Mideast, Russell was able to ace the geography portion of the SATs.

Things I've learned...

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

I think you'll appreciate my resume. It's printed on a fridge magnet.

Scientist has note on chalkboard: E=mc2 + 6% sales tax.

'Oddly enough you're the third person to buy that today!'

"It's a great story, funny and entertaining - and better still it's not won a single prize for literature."

"And today children, Homer is going to show us his 'pressed fly and bug collection'."

"I'd like these invested in an aggressive mutual fund."

"Okay, it if makes you feel better...yes, I have stock in a banana company."

Bird reading '1001 pickup lines' - 'I'm getting ready for mating season.'

"The first thing we should do is get you two into a good mutual fund. Let me get out the 'Magic 8 Ball' and we'll fun some options."

The last of the Mom and Pop brokerage houses

"So, you're telling me that you can't return, 'How to be a secret agent' because the final chapter instructed you to eat it after reading?"

Investments: We have locally grown stocks.

Ransom Library. Oh, that's just Henry … He's a history buff. Wild West.

'Good book?'

Locally Grown Stocks, Farm Fresh CDs, Free Range Annuities.

Animal worries.

1,000 places to see after you die by Shirley Maclaine.

'That's Renfrew -- he's in charge of high-risk portfolios.'

"I didn't raise my hand. I was just stretching."

"You should consider buying."

"Don't put your money into stocks. Bury it!"

"We've got an application from a bank asking if we'd like to sponsor a branch."

Essay Paper.

'Finzter, our newest investment adviser, believes that money can make you happy.'

Garage Sale: Assorted shares of stocks.