Quirky Bread Buyer Gifts

'The scanner says you're the only one in the neighborhood of your ethnic group who buys raisin bread.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

"I'm afraid the challah got a little burnt this week."

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

"They always throw us stale bread, so I've decided to bake my own, fresh break..."

Doughboy Dad

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

'The body is made up of millions and millions of crumbs.'

Unfinished Funiture Store.

Country farmhouse loaf / Inner city highrise loaf.

Corner Bakery ... Bread and Breakfast.

Supermarket - World Cup Specials

There! I've made my year's supply of zucchini bread! That's kind of a lot. How can you store them all? It's no problem. I just throw out last year's supply.

Unusual Offers

'Dorothy - we're not in the health food section anymore.'

"Okay, lets see what we have here."

Shampoo and Salad Dressing.

'Are you the guy who put gluten in the bread?'

'Look, Mum, those loaves have had some babies!'

'Triple-headed razors?... Aisle seven.'

'Please enter your pin now.'

"Look lively crew, lest we be dashed upon these scrumptious shores."

You've been found guilty by a jury of your peers -- You're toast fella!

Armstrong, the new Ybox game console comes out next week. I've got to get in line at Computer Villa. Nope. You are callous and inhumane. Fortunately, I have a backup plan. Computer Villa sale! If anyone cuts, chew their nose off.

"Marriage is a compromise. I'm sweet rye and your father is sourdough, but we make it work."

"It all began when I was a boy. The aroma of freshly baked bread was everywhere, choking me with it's calm, soothing and nutritious lies..."

Early Morning Roll Call.

(Direct to the Consumer)

Come dine with me!

"Does it come with magnets?"

'Admit it, dear, you've been keeping sliced bread a secret all these years in order to save our marriage, haven't you?'

Bakery. The smell of freshly baked bread is the only truly perfect man-made thing on earth.