Quirky Banking Enthusiast Gifts

It's Time For You To Start Banking At The First National Artiste Savings & Loan.

"What's a debenture?"

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

"We rolled your account over, sir, and that just made it worse."

'Our fund lost millions, but the good news is our management fees are not based on performance.'

Bank Loans - Thank you, I shall always be in your debt.

Payback Time

'I hope it's fixed soon. I miss the convenience and friendly beep.'

Banker stepping into 'New image' in 'Savings and Loans' office

I have a dream.

Paul Wolfowitz.

'Waiter, there's a bank in the soup.'

"The bank examiners are here, oh!...I see you already know."

'When I grow up I want to be a bank.'

"We've got an application from a bank asking if we'd like to sponsor a branch."

Loans. To make a long story short, my cash flow needs some new tributaries.

Bank Checking and Savings. How about some clouds on your scenic checks since they never seem to clear anyway?

Friendly banks and Cold and aloof banks.

'No sir, I said could I have an increase in SALARY.'

'This is your third withdrawal this week... how about a little deposit once in a while?'

'I'd like to apply for a job as a predatory lender.'

'There's been a big bank merger, sir, so you now have a joint checking account with a Mr. Slavomir Bezparyadok of Zagreb.'

Piggy Banks/Cash Cows/Free Chicken Account.

"The bank accepted bones in the eighties. We don't accept bones anymore."

'There's a five dollar discrepancy in my bank balance. Would you mind if I counted the money?'

"Avoid financial ventures—your credit line is very short."

'If you're opening a joint account, Dr. Jekyll, the other account holder has to be here to sign.'

FIRST NATIONAL, TELLER, 'Thirty-seven dollars? -- you call THAT overdrawn?'

A simple clue that your bank has been sold: "Would you like that in dollars or yen?"

'How many pension fund managers does it take to change a lightbulb...?'

"The Queen beat you to it!!"

'Sorry. We've had to close your 'chicken' account ma'am. Everything you write bounces.'

'The trouble started when the world put together a large group of synchronized banks.'

'Why have you taken 50% of my investment?'

Harvest Data Festival