Quirky Gifts

A Con-artist offering brain scans to the public from his flatbed scanner.

'RUN FOR COVER!!!!! It's another one of those 'Baby Showers'!!!

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

Mouse execution

Best before 65 million BC.

Leaking 'waterbed of nails'.

"I'd like to order a cheese pizza with everything on it except cheese."

"We're bringing the arts and sciences together here by giving crayons to mice."

'Oh, Arthur...You sweet, blind, mad, dear, silly fool....Don't you see it could never last?'

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

Great British Eccentrics.

Nun Fight.

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

Hats and Food

Ralph spent his Sundays in the park gathering nuts.

"Of course they're permanent. I'm an artist."

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

"Now that's what I'M talkin' 'bout!"

Man finishing painting through flap in door.

Texturing the Walls

Dog admiring hairless dog calendar

"Sorry - He's changed His mind again. Stripes on the zebra, spots on the giraffe, no stars on the lion and make the elephant bigger and the amoebae smaller."

"I expect you all to be team players - except Ted, whom I expect to remain team mascot."

Victorian Gentleman

"Hell, Mom! How's it look?!" "Holy mackerel."

"Albert is the first whistler to use hearing aid feedback as an intro to one of his tunes."

"Somehow, some way, we have to guide these people back to reality!"

'I just had this sudden urge to stand out in a crowd...'.

Celebrity Phrenologist.

Weight lifter using his foot to take a photograph.

"Cliff's really devoted to his art. He'll wait hours for someone to take a shot to the groin."

Real Estate Personals

"The board is going to have to talk to 5-G again."

"My two-year-old actually did paint that."

"I didn't have a carrot so I used a fish stick for his nose."