Qualification Quester Gifts

'With these qualifications, the only thing I can suggest is a career as a Big Issue seller.'

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Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

A Knight Arrives at a Boiling Lake Filled with Monsters (Don Quixote).

"Would you like something you're under qualified for, or something you're overqualified for?"

'It says here you can talk trash in five languages.'

Answers to last week's brain-teasers

"...and I'm proficient in two languages ? English and text messaging."

"Sorry, but you're overqualified."

"You're not giving me the job because I'm 'over qualified'? Oh, don't worry, most of those qualifications have been falsified."

'I've overcome my fears of personal mortality and the indifference of the Universe, but I'm still a little worried about those skip-tracers.'

"Hey, there's a spare key hidden under this cloud!"

Newly Qualified Teacher.

'I'd like to eat out for a change.'

The Water Diviner

Qualifications

Congestion Eases Inexplicably

'I'm not sure that mentioning your diploma in 'Monkey Business' really helps your resume...'

'I didn't say I majored in business administration - I said I took business administration.'

'I smell romance! This is his seventh blanket-bath. He only came in for an 'in-growing toe-nail' removal operation, yesterday!'

'Center for rat race studies'

'I've been reincarnated 47 time, and it's ALWAYS as some poor schlub sitting on a mountain!'

"I didn't get the job. They said I was over-qualified."

'Being able to 'Raise the Dead' is all very well but I'm afraid it's not much use without the appropriate qualifications.'

"I see you have a N.V.Q and a M.B.A."

Clancy:Survey Question

'I exaggerated on my resume and I was still underqualified.'

400 words per minute! Is that typing or shredding?

"Yep, that's a new sign: I've just finished my law-degree..."

'Quiet Zone' in the desert.

Pandemic Pitfall!

I got a cd, a book, a dvd, a cute tin, some candy, a card, and…Oh, shoot. I forgot to get a coffee. Starbucks.

"Don't breath a word to anyone, but I'm never leaving graduate school."

"Sorry, go on, I was just distracted for a moment by all my qualifications."

Man outside a coffee shop uses a 'Latte Nav'.