Qualification Collector Gifts

"Don't breath a word to anyone, but I'm never leaving graduate school."

"I didn't get the job. They said I was over-qualified."

"I see you have a N.V.Q and a M.B.A."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"Make a lot of money."

Interdisciplinary studies.

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

'So you have a PhD, big deal, everyone working here has one! The question is, what can you really do?'

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

"I started a collection!"

"It's translated from French, so where it says 'Harvard Business School' it may mean 'jail.'"

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

Sharp Eyes

'He's just come back from another management training course.'

'What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

"I wonder what this was for."

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

Time Table

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

'How old is this vase?'

'Well, do you want to sign up or not?' - 'Um...yes and no.'

Florida Golf.

"Hmm interesting Hallmark..."

'This is Liam, Dad, one of the few people with a degree in both tree hugging and extreme cartwheeling.'

'...but the good new is your old Enron stock has become a high-priced collectible!'

Wise Cracker

"I never expected you to pay through the nose."

"Sorry, but you're overqualified."

'Your entire library consists of nothing but tabloids bound in Corinthian leather?'

'His dad was a standup. He's a quip off the old block.'

Time traveller of the year, 3173, A.D.