Purrfect Drink Server Gifts

"Has someone forgotten the cucumber slice and lemon wedge in my spring water again, Edna?"

"Another dry scotch Manhattan, Mike. Make it a double."

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

"I make it myself!"

Joyce could certainly handle her drink!

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

Harvey went to the kitchen to top up his gin and tonic. When he came back, things took an unexpected turn.

I'd like a mocha almond vanilla latte...hold the coffee.

'I feel cosmopolitan tonight, Joe - Give me a scotch with an irish Chaser.'

"Our sommelier - years of experience in French urinals."

California Beverages Map

Complaints Desk

'Shaken, not stirred.'

'You brought me a drink last night Dad.I reckon it's MY round tonight!'

"Do you have something for somebody with no palette, no taste and no money?"

"This family-owned boutique wine is produced from a single grape."

'Another martini please.'

"So, it's decided, the party will be on the tenth and BYO drinks as usual..."

"Bring us your dustiest bottle of wine."

"We recommend red wine with mice and white wine with birds."

"This wine is CORKED!"

You can never over garnish!

'I think it's time we left...'

"What wine would you recommend to compliment stony silence?"

"It's an agreeable little wine."

"What wine goes well with £5.52p?"

"Whiskey and splash coming up!"

'Hi, Dad! We were going to set up the lemonade stand you suggested, but then Jamie got an even better idea!'

Coffee Overload: 'I'll have a low fat soy latte, no sugar, two biscotti...make that a Columbian-Kenyan bean bend...oh make it snappy, I'm in a hurry!'

"I don't care if it's forty years old and has a good body! I'm trying to get pissed, not date it!"

"If you want to impress your date then I'd recommend this totally overpriced booze. If not, then the cheap box of plonk will do perfectly."

"A pox on your house red."