Punny Fellow Gifts

No, Ernie --- Female chipmunks aren't called chip-nuns.

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

'Who wants to be examined first?'

'All right!! Bull's-eye!'

"I'm dating a lunar astronaut!"

"Why have you called him ballpoint?"

'Can you just send the digital copy?'

Dear Dairy

Happy Hog - Manet

Planting vegetables - "BEAN there done that."

Stud Finders: 'These don't even work!'

"...then - and here's the funny part - I add the potassium sulfate..."

SCUBER

"Honey, I just got 't-boned' off I-80 West of Omaha!"

'Smooth move -- Now we're in REAL trouble!'

"Waiter! - will my pizza be long?"

'No, I don't do much flying. I'm just here for the peanuts!'

"Yes, Doreen, I think I am capable of unconditional love."

'I just had to come over...You caught my eye.'

Blake's Sealant.

'So, Harkness, I see that you have a very checkered background!'

"Can I get you your bill sir?"

"Do you remember what you had for lunch last Thursday?"

Wheelburrows.

One Winter Day In Old Moscow...

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up this office, and you'll pay the price.'

'Inner-city kids in search of a butter life.'

'I think I just invented 'Rock 'n Roll'.'

'Look, you still owe us 17 cents.. if you sweep up my office we'll call it even.'

Dairy. You're called "ruminants" because you chew your cud --- It's not an excuse to overthink everything.

When it rains, rob climbs the walls

'Do you like Indian food?' 'I have my reservations!'

Fish in gaol.

"How interesting, Mr Spladgeforth, we don't often see the Eiffel Tower made out of sausages!"

"Well, well! Looks like someone's not a happy camper! Get it? Happy camper? We're camping? Happy...cam...ahem..."