Psychoanalysis Fan Gifts

"Agenda item 1: My obsessive need to control."

"I think you need to enroll yourself in a good two-step program."

'You have to be patient, Miss McQueen. Sex addictions like yours take many sessions to cure.'

Multiple Personality Psychiatrists

Unsmiley face at the psychiatrist...

'Look, you can only do so much!'

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

'My understanding of psychiatry is that women fantasiss and men internalise - in fact I'd like to internalise right now.'

'I sense that someone is about to swindle you.' 'Wow, thanks for the warning! How much do I owe you?'

* For latent content, see your psychiatrist.

My Brother Al once went through a period of depression, your honor. He would just sit around in his robe all day. Then his psychiatrist got him out of his funk. Would you like to have his doctor's phone number? ? ?

"I'm the bad guy..."

Pavlov's Puppy

"...Wow, if Malcolm Gladwell is right, we need to get a cat who's a Virgo ASAP!"

'Waiter, there's a Fly-Agaric in my soup.'

How to cope in Los Angeles vs. New York

Free-Floating Anxiety

Redlaw and the Phantom

Blok drives by New York City.

'...and when the wolves moved house I was adopted by beetles.'

'It's psychological I know, but it makes me feel warmer...'

"This may be Malcolm Gladwell talking, but we were married on the wrong day!"

"Look out, Luke Grasswalker! Irascibility leads to the dark side of the force. . . right into a hamburger bun."

Pavlov's Cat

Regardless children just want to fit in.

Gangs of New York

"My brother is always trying to one-up me. As soon as I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder he said he had tripolar disorder."

PSYCHIATRIC CLINIC, 'You know what I dread? -- March madness!'

"Tom, let's explore why you feel Andrea's inability to understand 'icing the puck' is passive-aggressive."

Chuck didn't care what his therapist said; that is not where he left his dummy.

Mummy Shrink.

"Dopamine Casino. Gambling that makes you feel like gambling."

"You have got to want to change."

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -