Psychic Gourmet T-Shirts

"He'll have the meat loaf"

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

'Needs salt!'

'I'll have the bacon and hay wrap.'

"Just a pinch, Helga ... spicy eye of newt doesn't agree with me."

Sure, I'll take a sandwich

'Our guest tonight certainly needs no introduction.'

The Good Feud Guide - 'Delia Smith does a nice roasted Worrall-Thompson.'

Writer and his Muse on a cookout.

'Most, yes, but they're not all carcinogenic!'

"You think you're so damn Cordon Bleu!"

"I enjoy eating healthy – I just don’t like the food."

"It all comes down to the aging and fermentation process."

Stand back - while I whip something up

'I enjoyed the deviled ham, the deviled eggs and the devil's food cake, but we need a menu more in tune with our mission.'

'...and that concludes this seminar on healthy living. Now, if anyone cares to join me, I'm off to that new place down the street for some steak and a few beers.'

"Monsieur Proust, we would like to discuss product placement for one of our cakes...."

'Now watch and listen!'

"I recommend the businessman's lunch, sir, mammon notwithstanding."

"All I've got left is smoked."

Frisbee dog catching pizza dough

"Elaine! The avocados are ripe—what do we do? What do we do?"

"We've gone 'Glutton-Free'."

Lemon beelzebub for table 666

Hudson River Crouton

'Oh no wonder, this is Extra Virgin Mary Olive Oil.'

'How come you never bring meatballs?'

Why Shirley hates to eat genetic modified Broccoli.

"Well, we went through the fruit and veg, and thought we should try something more exotic - like the space-time continuum."

"I still call it a custard tart but to be honest, it's a dairy free, soy fructose mix, with no nuts."

I never had a pony, Dr. Kapuchnik. Get over it, Al. Tastes like chicken.

"I'm sorry it's not what you ordered, but the chef works in mysterious ways."

Spaceman serving shrimp.

"Set phazers to medium rare!"

"You want fries with that Chardonnay?"