Proverb Aficionados Gifts

Hog Heaven: 'So, this is when pigs fly...'

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

Man selling 'pearls of wisdom'.

'And though he died during the hunt, we can only assume that George L Jones would want this new species of butt-faced clown monkey to forever bear his name.'

Caution: ironic literal proverb ahead (fork in the road)

'You can't win - a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but ignorance is no excuse!'

"Like they say, April lenders brings May spenders."

Cold Enough to Freeze Brass Monkeys.

Fisherman: 'HOLY MACKEREL!'

"If he who hesitates is lost, why do we have to look before we leap?"

"Don't even think about it."

'My other baby is Mercedes'

"Sinead?!"

"To stay in or not to stay in...."

Curiosity discovers life on Mars

'We think Rome was built at night sir, because last week you told us that Rome wasn't built in a day!'

"I think you need to reboot your carrot."

'My mother always told me if it ain't broke, date it.'

Yep, that's me in a pea pod! In a pea pod�?? I think "nutshell" has been vastly overused.

See no evil, Hear No Evil, Speak no evil. . .

Let to water, wouldn't drink, kicked off farm.

Schlock Holmes

'It's always darkest just before Dawn.'

'The longest journey beings with a single step.' Mao would have made great congressman!

"Some guys from the state board of medicine are here to see you."

A vending machine is dispensing free lunches for $10

'Just a minute!'

'Do you think we should tell anyone about this?' The discovery that money actually does grow on trees.

'Waiter! This broth tastes spoiled!'

'No use crying over spilt milk.'

Spice Up Your Conversation - Quote Yourself...

"You know, after all these years of giving you advice on all. Things personal and professional, it occurred to me that you've never actually asked for my opinion."

Happy masks protest against sad masks.

She was a left hand that didn't know what her right hand was doing.

'I'll look for apples -- you keep an eye out for early birds.'