Protective Parents Gifts

Parents dressing children in protective gear in order to play conkers.

"Sorry we have to leave, but it is 8:30 and our 28 year old is home alone..."

"I kept dropping my phone and cracking the screen. So, my parents bought me a thicker cover."

'Your honor, we find the defendant not guilty, but we sure wouldn't let our daughters go out with him!'

Rapunsel's father sets a trap.

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

'I can't control my anger when people get too close to my kids...'

"I don't care why you crossed the road! I do care however about "how" you crossed the road: without checking for cars first!"

"Why not stay with your mother and me? The Feds will never find you here."

First Steps

'Honey...you're spoiling that child.'

Snacks for Learners

'It's my mother. She wants to talk to you.'

"I never got the chance to be homesick. You tweeted about me 20 times a day."

Bad Grammar, But Good Pluck.

To insure Rodney's safe websurfing, Thelma sets her own parental controls.

"No - wait, I haven't read them all yet..."

"I don't want you swimming in the ocean -- it's a toilet that hasn't been flushed in 4 billion years."

'I'm his MOTHER. I KNOW he was safe!'

"My father would never let me marry a boy with a combover."

I'm teaching my kid how to stay safe online.

"See, Timmy? No boogeymen under your bed — they're all out there."

I wish my baby came with suction cups so there was a place to put him while I shower.

Family wearing shin guards to protect against the kid in a play car.

"Daddy's still up - I can see him loading his shotgun."

"I just decided what my daughter is going to wear to this year's prom."

"Lawsuits must really be getting out of hand."

Safety is about FAMILY!...

"I'm sorry your son Billy ran away, but there's not much we can do being that he's thirty-four."

'My Mother makes me wear this - It's my name and address in case I get lost.'

"Daddy, why do you always insist on wearing your karate suit when you meet any of my new boyfriends?!"

"So long, Ma, I'm riding off into the sunset."

"Grumble all you want, but if you're not wearing your PPE, I won't let you use tools!"

Bring my daughter back at 11 sharp or...

'Nobody kicks sand in Henry's face!'