Property Gurus Gifts

Letting agent on the phone: 'OK, so there's fungus in the bathroom - but on the plus side, it IS organic.'

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

'As my solicitor I think you could have negotiated that better.'

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

"Look, son, real estate."

Reverse Mortgage.

"Of course I have a little weekend shell in the country..."

"Of course you're feeling tired - you're in your sub-prime."

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

'We'll convert it into flats and revitalise the area.'

"I think we could be very happy here until we aren't."

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

"Sold his air rights."

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

Home Sweet Second Home.

"It's not so much a fixer upper as a tear it downer."

The End of the Property Boom is Nigh.

'So what if you found it? Whatever it is, it belongs to ME! Now, get off my beach!'

'I need to tell Edgar...our house sold for a million two.'

Repossessions

House hunting is cruel.

"Ok Mr. Bisley, I'll admit it does need a bit of renovation..!"

'This is close enough.'

Dog Realtor

'Don't wait too long to decide. A house with a view like this can go at any minute....'

'It looked a lot bigger in the photos.'