Profit Lover Gifts

'Gentlemen, our corporate profits.'

'It was love at first sight!'

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

'Dammit - how do we get in on that gross national product?'

(Visual gag) Wellard's annual BIG HANDBAG SALE!! A woman is dragging a huge bag out from a bag shop

Our Motto: Buy Low Sell High is the Best Revenge.'

Three businessmen using a pulley system to change a graph

'I highly recommend this painting if you're interested in art as an investment.'

'It's not surprising. The production department is in Spain, the warehouse is in Korea, the accounting division is in Bolivia, the board of directors is in Canada.'

"Who's ready to see what's going to happen in the fourth quarter?"

"There's gotta be a way to make money off this."

'We need a product line that will stimulate our profit line.'

Wearing a sales chart as a name badge.

'Looks like the perfect time to bring in our profit sharing scheme.'

'I'm worried about all these unemployed. They're still on our payroll'

"Now that's how to declare a dividend!"

'The good news is that we're making huge profits - the bad news is that we won't be getting a bailout.'

"My name's Edwin, and I'm addicted to risk."

"And here is where we started putting profits before people."

'Maximising shareholder value doesn't count.'

Business Outlook

'I took my money out of the bank and put it into municipal bonds...'

'You're my economic advisor. What'll I do?'

'Harrison, going against your better judgement has made us a lot of money...'

"I can't understand it, we did quite well in the first three quarters.

"Today we welcome back an old friend."

"Is it too late for me to stop poo pooing his expansion plan?"

"A good quarter is a joy forever."

'I know what we need to turn this around, a mindless product that will make money fly out of peoples pocketbooks!'

"And this all happened in the last week..."

'We care because we haven't made enough money not to.'

"Hang on! - we've possibly go another couple of films left in here!!"

'Don't you ever knock?'

"I suppose you're wondering why I've summoned you here at 3 AM, minion." "I try not to wonder." "After crunching the numbers, I've determined we'd increase profits by being open 24/7." "We're in the suburbs. Everyone's asleep." "Not true. By being closed at 3 AM, we're missing out on the potentially-lucrative Igor the Wino clientele." "Go to the alley and give Igor a 1-for-the-price-of-2 coupon." "Very bad man."