Product Novelty Hunter Pillows

"I'm really excited about this new product!"

Clown on bike.

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

Fly Football

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

hard-boiled egg...

Raincloud Umbrella

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

"Wilson, I built this company from scratch!"

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

"This new phone app for opening the beer is great, Bruce!"

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

Apocalypse Research Center

Bathroom Fairy

'What kind of filling would you like?'

Family heirlooms that will never make it onto the mantelpiece.

A close shave on the Titanic...

'Have you any W fronts?'

'Remember, before entering, make sure you wipe your feet on the hazmat.'

Happy Bifurcation Day,

'Please enter your pin now.'

Who'd have guessed that the season's mast have item would be big springy shoes.

'These new metal detectors are great!'

Melvin likes to indulge his inner child.

"It called a smart phone. Cool, but no service."

Tin Can Operation.

"Thank you for holding. . .Your call is important to us. . .Yeah right."

Nobody's Perfact (spelled wrong)

"The reason you're not popular is...well...you smell like shark repellant."

"Rats! It doesn't work...but why?? Why??!!"

Leaking backpack.

'Celeb Foods: Damien Hurst's voles in brine.'

"I got it in a novelty shop. But it has decreased loitering around the watercooler with 29%!"