Procrastination Strategist Gifts

'Danae...you seem to spend twice the time and energy in avoiding your schoolwork than it would take to actually do the work...How far do you expect that'll get you in life?'

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

"Here, we do not procrastinate, we 'table' things."

"I work out in preparation for being out of shape for the next 30 years."

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

"Better start moving towards shelter: the weather forecast is for rain this afternoon..."

"Why can't I get anything done unless I'm totally stressed out about it?" "Is it possible to be relaxed and still be productive?" "What is wrong with my brain?" "Why don't you work better?"

'Truth? I am just looking out the window...'

Fact: The average person spends 4.3 hours per week looking for things that are misplaced, misfiled or mislabeled.

"Thank god you're early. It's a can of worms."

"It says here that if you read stuff on an electronic device you can miss the big picture."

Is plagiarism the same as value adding?

"Never do today what someone else can do tomorrow."

Travelogue

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

"I wasn't expecting to be in here for so long."

"I tried getting good grades without studying, but it isn't working."

"Sitting here with you each day at sunset reminds me I have to get a job."

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

"I really start dragon around 3 o'clock."

Sisyphus Gets a Desk Job.

'I think it has reached critical mass.'

"I think I see your deadline approaching."

How lazy people decide what to eat

"Let's face it, this meeting isn't about tightening our work schedule. It's about stretching our deadline."

Chairmen of the Bored

"I wish I could lay there all day watching funny cat videos..."