Procrastination Pioneer Gifts

Displacement activities for people who work from home...

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

"Three weeks until the pitch, LOADS of time!"

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

Desk Boxes: 'In', 'Out', 'Could Go Either Way'.

"Why can't I get anything done unless I'm totally stressed out about it?" "Is it possible to be relaxed and still be productive?" "What is wrong with my brain?" "Why don't you work better?"

"Thank god you're early. It's a can of worms."

'Truth? I am just looking out the window...'

Fact: The average person spends 4.3 hours per week looking for things that are misplaced, misfiled or mislabeled.

'I'm just going to go and slip into something more comfortable, like denial.'

"It says here that if you read stuff on an electronic device you can miss the big picture."

Man needs to buy excuse for missing work from vending machine.

"I tried getting good grades without studying, but it isn't working."

"Sitting here with you each day at sunset reminds me I have to get a job."

"Never do today what someone else can do tomorrow."

"Don't open me, you fool!"

Research and Development: Now, Never.

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

"I really start dragon around 3 o'clock."

Is plagiarism the same as value adding?

"I wish my Dad would get off my back! It's only been nine years and he wants to know if I've picked a major yet!"

Sisyphus Gets a Desk Job.

"I think I see your deadline approaching."

How lazy people decide what to eat

We interrupt this program to bring you, Tommy, a message from you teacher. Have you finished your report on frogs?

"Let's face it, this meeting isn't about tightening our work schedule. It's about stretching our deadline."

Chairmen of the Bored

"And then, suddenly, it was 3 P.M., and she hadn't really got anything done."

Could I have a minute of your valuable time, Timpson?

The artist wakes refreshed, creative juices flowing.

"I wish I could lay there all day watching funny cat videos..."