Pro-level Complainer Gifts

'I'll tell you what life's all about...'

'Almost everything I have hurts and what doesn't hurt doesn't work!'

Man from refuse department says: 'We'll send you a new wheelie bin, Mrs Trubshaw, there's really no need to 'orchestrate a mass Twitter campaign'.'

#notblessed

"I finally have an ailment that isn't so bad that I'm worried, but bad enough for me to complain about constantly"

'Typical, I hadn't finished complaining about the rain...'

Welcome to Yosemite, Hell on Earth!

'I thought I'd seen everything, and then my wife came up with tofu fajitas.'

"We only shop brick and mortar because my husband likes to be disgruntled face-to-face when returning things."

"I don't like it already."

"True, the fly is not in my soup. But it took one taste of my soup and dropped dead."

"One more remark like that, lady, and you'll never get to see this show."

Input (not yours) and Output (only mine).

'Sure I had the world on a string, sittin' on a rainbow, but my finger turned blue and my hemorrhoids were killing me!'

"Waiter, there's a greenfly in my soup!"

"Where does it hurt?"

"'C-minus'? -- I'd like to speak to your supervisor!"

STRIP Hambone: Techinical support in layman's terms #2

"Want to bitch for one more lap?"

'I hope you find something that's worth complaining to my friends about.'

'You know, this work is misery, but I really like the people I work with.'

'What are you annoyed about now?'

"Don't worry about me. I can be unhappy just about anywhere."

Complaint Department worker. 'Gosh, I'm good at this job!'

'Hi, I'm from Complainers Anonymous. Can I see the manager?'

Complaints and Gratitude.

'I'm afraid your complaining is chronic.' - 'I want a second opinion!!'

'You can contact us 3 ways: an email that will be trashed, a fax that will be buried, and a letter which will be lost.'

'The alarm didn't go off, my car wouldn't start, missed the bus, my back's aching, haven't had a raise in two years ...'

"Do you mind? That’s really annoying."

"He's head over heels, worships the ground I walk on – kind of annoying."

'I'm just going to our front gate for a chunner!'

"This the last time I reply all."

Mowing Job Sucks.

"Too sunny for you. Too dry. Whatever next?"