Noise Complainer Gifts

"Do you mind? That’s really annoying."

Man about to hammer nail into wall as neighbour listens.

At the rock concert...

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

'Almost everything I have hurts and what doesn't hurt doesn't work!'

Cat and Broom

Cop gives ASBO to cockerel: 'This of this as a cock-a-doodle-don't.'

"I finally have an ailment that isn't so bad that I'm worried, but bad enough for me to complain about constantly"

Welcome to Yosemite, Hell on Earth!

'I thought I'd seen everything, and then my wife came up with tofu fajitas.'

"We only shop brick and mortar because my husband likes to be disgruntled face-to-face when returning things."

Turn that noise down !

"True, the fly is not in my soup. But it took one taste of my soup and dropped dead."

"One more remark like that, lady, and you'll never get to see this show."

"In space, there is no sound. Except those - we can still hear those @#%* things."

"I'm sick of that bloody racket next door...!!"

"Where does it hurt?"

'Sure I had the world on a string, sittin' on a rainbow, but my finger turned blue and my hemorrhoids were killing me!'

"'C-minus'? -- I'd like to speak to your supervisor!"

"Want to bitch for one more lap?"

'I hope you find something that's worth complaining to my friends about.'

This is a library - no sonic booms, please.

'You know, this work is misery, but I really like the people I work with.'

Complaint Department worker. 'Gosh, I'm good at this job!'

"Don't worry about me. I can be unhappy just about anywhere."

'What are you annoyed about now?'

'Hi, I'm from Complainers Anonymous. Can I see the manager?'

Complaints and Gratitude.

'I'm afraid your complaining is chronic.' - 'I want a second opinion!!'

'You can contact us 3 ways: an email that will be trashed, a fax that will be buried, and a letter which will be lost.'

'The alarm didn't go off, my car wouldn't start, missed the bus, my back's aching, haven't had a raise in two years ...'

'Could you speak up a little? - I've got six billion of the little twerps buzzing in my ears!'

'Why is it that every time I see you all you ever do is complain?'

'I'm just going to our front gate for a chunner!'

"Hold on, let me put you on megaphone."