Prisoner Of Punchlines Pillows

'That's nothing -- I'm serving THREE sentences concurrently!'

Snowprov

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

'It's good to see you, Mr. McWit, but you do realize that today is neither Christmas or Easter?'

"White Collar Prison"

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

'No need to yell son, I may be deaf, but I can still read.'

"That's two tossed salads, one egg drop soup, and one pulled pork."

"I almost got away with it! Then somebody called in the SWAT team!"

Minutes Later The Course Of Comedy Would Be Changed Forever.

Comedy Rule

"Just be happy you're getting in, worry about your hair later."

"...And I don't want any resentments just because someone hits below the belt..."

'I'm in for being a killer. You?'

'If you don't mnage to have enough sunshine you should eat more of oily fish, black caviare, eggs and butter.'

"You can't go on because you're 'feeling funny'? In your case it's so rare, make the most of it!"

'Look on the bright side. You haven't paid a penny in tax since you've been here.'

"So the vet says, 'If this is my thermometer, then where's my pen?' . . . Get it!? . . . IS this thing on!?"

"Nurse, can you send in the interpreter for Senora Delgado?"

'I was innocent until proven guilty, which took about fifteen minutes.'

'I'm only here to pep up my autobiography.'

'Now look what you've done. I told you that I wanted a fair fight... making fun of his trunks is hitting below the belt.'

Right jab or left jab.

'21 Today - he wants the key of the door...'

"My computer has a virus. I'm calling in sick."

'There's one clever man, he managed to lose almost a billion dollars before they caught him.'

'I'm here for trying to keep my nose clean. I got caught stealing a packet of tissues.'

Clancy:Survey Question

'Thanks, that looks delicious, charge it to my room, would you?'

"Any word on my appeal?"

"Careful, Rocky. You're about to give away the secret behind your knockout punches."

STRIP Hambone: Prisoner visited by a computer

'No, not that one, too Woody Allen...'

'Why did you leave your last job after being there for twenty years?' 'I got paroled.'

Break-ins by the Masochist Society