Prison Satire Fans Gifts

Worst escape attempt ever.

'Let's get a kitty.'

'No need to come in.. you can fax me your resume.'

"How'd you know I was in for cyber crime?"

'See, I told you it was a good idea to talk to the plants.'

Conrad Black will be unable to do his investment club's tax returns this year.

"This is why I don't want you doing our taxes anymore."

Inmate on cell phone: 'I'd like to request 'Jailhouse Rock'.'

"Murder one. How about you?" "I tried to rob an arts and crafts store with a hot glue gun."

Man in arrow suit - 'I'm in for white collar crime.'

Prison baseball game features Bankers vs. Wall Street.

'The SEC got me for inflating the numbers..'

Bullfighter and Bull Cellmates

"They want to spend the weekend at Daddy's" (Colour)

"Try and give me... happy."

'Hey. You're back.'

'I'm in here for something I didn't do alright-I didn't pay my Council Tax!'

'It's amazing the change in his attitude since he took up knitting.'

'We've been married so long we finish each other's prison sentences.'

'Jackie Chan caught you? Now, that's a coincidence - Charlie Chan caught me!'

'Sorry, but none of our entrees are available for takeout.'

'So, how was your day?'

Exercise yard: 'It's windy this morning!' (Arrows on uniform all blowing away).

"He stole my heart, I stole his wallet. – Now that's what I call vengeance."

"Ironically, I've got no bars."

"Each time I was told to put myself in another man's shoes, I walk away in 'em."

'The first time it was a fine. Second time, fine and probation. Third time...'

When Financial Planners Go To Prison.

'Juries have never liked me.'

'I demand a new cellmate! -- that bum you put me with is a thief!'

'This wine is made from fermented raisins by convicts in the state penitentiary...'

'Just like being in the Post Office!'

Listen. I'll change it in 30 - 60 days. Just use the yard until then.

"You're new, I suppose."

Dear Edward, here is the cake in the file that you wanted. Love, Sue.