Fans Of Prison Humor Gifts

Exercise yard: 'It's windy this morning!' (Arrows on uniform all blowing away).

'Let's get a kitty.'

'My wife says not to worry. She's convinced she can get me out of here with coupons.'

'No need to come in.. you can fax me your resume.'

'I mistakenly thought that 'mutual' meant the funds were equally mine to use.'

'OVERCROWDED-I'll say it's OVERCROWDED!'

"How'd you know I was in for cyber crime?"

'See, I told you it was a good idea to talk to the plants.'

"This is why I don't want you doing our taxes anymore."

Conrad Black will be unable to do his investment club's tax returns this year.

Man in arrow suit - 'I'm in for white collar crime.'

"Murder one. How about you?" "I tried to rob an arts and crafts store with a hot glue gun."

'I tried to give a woman the Heimlich maneuver, and it turned out she was doing the Macarena.'

Inmate on cell phone: 'I'd like to request 'Jailhouse Rock'.'

'He didn't wash his hands.'

Prison baseball game features Bankers vs. Wall Street.

Post Office fraud wing in a prison.

'I suppose you'd like your porridge shaken, not stirred?'

"Look on the bright side. You no longer live with your parents."

'They got me for 'hate-texting.''

'She kept asking me to say what was on my mind so I did. She told her analyst and then the FBI.'

Bullfighter and Bull Cellmates

'The SEC got me for inflating the numbers..'

"They want to spend the weekend at Daddy's" (Colour)

"I can't continue to be your lawyer if you won't show up at the hearings."

"The other gangs can give you protection. We can give you free wi-fi."

'Ms. Daly, have there been any important e-mails or voice-mails during my incarceration?'

'Hey. You're back.'

'I'm in here for something I didn't do alright-I didn't pay my Council Tax!'

All I'm saying is, the next time you go for a perp walk, I'd like to be included.

'There's a rumour we're all going to be released and forced to join the NFL.'

'So, how was your day?'

'We've been married so long we finish each other's prison sentences.'

I don

'Some gagwriter you turned out to be!'