Pretend Patient Gifts

"But I don't want to get well, I'll have to go back to school!"

Little Doctor meets Little Geneticists.

"I'm afraid you have a condition called 'googly-eyes'."

"You want a generic or a regular sugar pill?"

'Nurse, I said x-ray, not microwave.'

'Thanks, but I don't expect you to chew my food for me.'

'Harvey does all his own 'get well' cards.'

"Jonathan! I've told you not to put your space toys in the freezer and pretend they're on the ice planet!"

"Are you Matthew Jones with a double 'T'?"

He kept pretending he was going to work when he was just running errands.

"Norton! Put that back at once!"

"I don't think the crackling sound coming from your lower back is as serious as you thought. Just relax and I'll have this Rice Krispie Square out of your back pocket in no time."

"I'm playing "Explorer" and looking for the Elephant Cemetery: there should be really big bones there!"

"Take a pill in the morning, in the afternoon and at night."

"Just give me the truth, Doc...I can tell when you're trying to humor me."

Doctor about spinning plates on patient: 'I'm concerned about his platelets.'

Disorderlies

'Admit it,you've been bothering the nurses again,haven't you?

"Everyone loved working with Doctor Patel... Beer!"

Doctor and nurse having a chat.

Patient to Doctor: 'This may hurt a little.'

'Where'd he go, nurse?'

'Don't get any ideas, mister -- I recognize that look in your eye!'

'So did you want the ectomy, or just the otomy?'

Doctor, I can't feel my legs! I know you can't, I had to amputate your arms.

"...and how about you, Wellington? Does this smell funny to you?"

"So laughter isn't the best medicine..."

'Malpractice? No - it's not our dog.'

"I think your problem is heartbeat-from-mouth syndrome."

"Sorry Mr Penrose. We forgot to shake your medicine this morning."

"How cute! Our technician photo-bombed your X-ray!"

'If you want to get anywhere with girls, you gotta PRETEND to like bunnies, ponies, and kittens.'

"Hi! My name is Dr. Jenkins and welcome to 'This is your disease'."

'BOy! Talk about organ rejection!'