Prehistorical Ponderer Gifts

"Primitive? Compared to what?"

'Well, there's something you don't see every day'

Ancient Racing

"And this is our media room."

'It's an extinction notice.'

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

65 Million Years Ago

The discovery of asparagus.

"Admit it, we're lost."

"Of course it's not clean energy -- We don't have clean ANYTHING!"

Another Theory as to Why Dinosaurs became Extinct.

The Evolution Of Man.

'We need to have a shake-up!'

Pre-Historic Gentleman's Duel

'Your 'marriage' invention sounds good, but what if it leads to a concentration of power for the central government?'

'O mighty gods! - May you grant us food, clothing, and shelter, and the wisdom to know the difference.'

'When do they learn to stand upright?'

'What distinguishes man from the lower animals is the ability to make tools.'

"How the hell is that supposed to feed us?"

The First Cone of Shame.

"Great, just great! And while you're in here, potchkeeing around with paint, Seymour Rabinowitz in the cave next door is inventing fire already!"

So, that's bipedalism? It doesn't look very ergonomic.

'Of course, I'm not one of those glamorous paleontologists who are all over TV these days.'

'Why is it always me that has to put the cat out?'

A caveman rubs two sticks together and gets a computer.

'We froze him until medical science knows how to cure spear wounds.'

Unknowingly, with one swish of his blood soaked mammoth tail he was inflicting pain and suffering on billions of unborn people. Home decorating had been invented.

"All I'm saying is now is the time to develop the technology to deflect an asteroid."

Unfortunately, napkins hadn't been invented yet, so good ideas were quickly forgotten.

'I just invented the 'chair' - It relieves lower back pain!'

"Your wheel idea was a huge hit, so what have you got for me this time?"

'The dawn of woman' - Ape-women dance around giant bar of chocolate.

'I'm telling you Dad: Walking upright and using tools is the way of the future...'

'It was fun to make bujt don't see any possible use for it in the future.'