Prehistorian Gifts

An ape is looking at a sign showing the evolution of man and it says 'You are here'.

Early fast food

'They're a nuisance, but they keep the smaller vermin down.'

'I just saw this fall out of a chicken's bum...let's eat it!'

'We've got a personnel problem -- by the time they punch in, they're too tired to work.'

"I wish sometimes that we'd never domesticated the damn things."

The invention of fire and the fire extinguisher

"I've invented the fire extinguisher."

'Well, there's something you don't see every day'

The first car accident.

Ancient Racing

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

"I don’t know what your invention’s called, but it’s really irritating."

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

"Wheel, schmeel—check these babies out!"

'It's an extinction notice.'

"Admit it, we're lost."

The discovery of asparagus.

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

Those Were The Days

"Or we could tally the sheep like this."

"Daddy's working from home today."

"No - you’re right. It’s dumb."

Caveman has a good idea for the wheel.

"The invention of taxidermy."

Another Theory as to Why Dinosaurs became Extinct.

"Look! Other people. We'll have to develop a foreign policy!"

'When do they learn to stand upright?'

'We unfortunately had to compress our dinosaur area due to budget cuts. On the bright side, TyrannoTriStegoApatoHadroPlesioSaurodon Rex here is now the museum's most popular exhibit.'

'Your 'marriage' invention sounds good, but what if it leads to a concentration of power for the central government?'

'Alphabet soup? What's alphabet?'

"I told you a firecracker behind his back didn't seem like a good idea!"

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

"How the hell is that supposed to feed us?"