Prehistoric Professional Gifts

Hunter Gatherer of the Month.

'Well, there's something you don't see every day'

The first car accident.

Ancient Racing

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

"I don’t know what your invention’s called, but it’s really irritating."

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

'It's an extinction notice.'

"Wheel, schmeel—check these babies out!"

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

The discovery of asparagus.

'This will be great for chase scenes.'

Those Were The Days

"Or we could tally the sheep like this."

"The invention of taxidermy."

"No - you’re right. It’s dumb."

"Daddy's working from home today."

Caveman has a good idea for the wheel.

'Alphabet soup? What's alphabet?'

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

The First Cone of Shame.

Big Rock University. Guidance Counselor. I'd like to switch my major from hunting to gathering!

"I told you a firecracker behind his back didn't seem like a good idea!"

"Look! Other people. We'll have to develop a foreign policy!"

'We unfortunately had to compress our dinosaur area due to budget cuts. On the bright side, TyrannoTriStegoApatoHadroPlesioSaurodon Rex here is now the museum's most popular exhibit.'

'When do they learn to stand upright?'

Early accounting scandals.

'My father is very hard to communicate with ? he only knows nouns and interjections.'

"Plagiarist!"

Early man wasn't exactly enthusiastic about the development of language.

"Say, Honey, how about a nice salad for supper instead?"

"I'd like you to see an Anthropologist.''

'Of course, I'm not one of those glamorous paleontologists who are all over TV these days.'

We never got anything done around here until we invented verbs.

'Why is it always me that has to put the cat out?'