Prehistoric Parenting Fan Gifts

Wife's out hunting. I'm a stay-at-cave dad.

'I told you it would be useful.'

The first car accident.

'Is that the only wallpaper you could find?!'

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

"So, you say I'll be doubling the numbers of animals I kill?"

'That's about it so far, Son.'

Caveman's dog with head outside car window.

"Well....I could've done this!"

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

'A wheel? No wonder I broke a tooth. I thought it was a donut.'

"Wheel, schmeel—check these babies out!"

The discovery of asparagus.

Primitive magician

'Jurassic Pork.'

Those Were The Days

"Daddy's working from home today."

OOG & SONS HUNTING & GATHERING

"The invention of taxidermy."

"No - you’re right. It’s dumb."

Caveman has a good idea for the wheel.

"Look! Other people. We'll have to develop a foreign policy!"

'Alphabet soup? What's alphabet?'

Og invents the first 'X' box. . . and inadvertently invents the first i pad.

'We unfortunately had to compress our dinosaur area due to budget cuts. On the bright side, TyrannoTriStegoApatoHadroPlesioSaurodon Rex here is now the museum's most popular exhibit.'

Big Rock University. Guidance Counselor. I'd like to switch my major from hunting to gathering!

Their relationship was doomed to fail. She was frigid, and his arms were too short to rub one out.

The First Sentence Fragment: 'Hey, don't -'

'...And they're giving us sixty million years to get in compliance.'

Early man wasn't exactly enthusiastic about the development of language.

"Say, Honey, how about a nice salad for supper instead?"

'You know, there's no need to reinvent the rock.'

"I'd like you to see an Anthropologist.''

I'm With Stooped

"In two million years from now people like me will still be very rich tanks to idiots like you!"