Retro Parenting Fan Gifts

'Look for one that says it's good for washing mouths out with.'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

Meet Me Outside St. Louis

'Why can't we trade him to that lady for her two little girls?'

Early Adopter...Early Opt-Outer

Gramophone dreams of mp3 player.

'I'm too hot to trot.'

Old rocker.

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

The perfect choice for president?... Stephen Colbert!

"Do you do much walking?"

"Remember you told me to put my client list on my computer."

Drive in movies.

"Remember that '70s TV show 'What's Happening'!? Did they ever come up with an answer?" "I don't know, but it makes me wonder if Marvin Gaye found out what's going on." "The black hole of cannabis-induced queries"

Punk rocker passing punk codger in street.

"The next song is for all you unreconstructed commies, who are still in love with their tractors."

Rod was unimpressed with the party - Sure, he was surrounded by bikini-clad lovelies, there was free champagne and a 20-foot jelly, but much to his chagrin, there was a distinct lack of cheese and pineapple chunks.

'Thanks for coming here today for my presentation, '10 cutting edge trends in the future of business analysis.' Copies of my talk will be available in the lobby in VHS and Betamax formats...'

'Sir, we need to upgrade our technology. We've used up our last roll of ticker tape.'

"I saw Elvis kissing Santa Claus."

"This week we're going to try some regression therapy."

"Now that I've invented it, I have-this odd compulsion to hold it in my hand whenever I go and glance at it incessantly."

'I just found out my vintage Roy Rogers lunch box is worth more than my 401k.'

"I just don't know what we'd have done without our subscription these past 25 years."

World Of Cow - 'If you must know, it's my Birthday and I happen to be great friends with Bob Dylan.'

'If you don't want to go digital, fine, but if you're going to store film in our cooler you have to save room some soda and beer."

We choose to send a cow to the moon and do the other things. Not because they are hard, but because it'll be darn funny!

Sunny and Chair

Hip Operation

"Just watching old stuff from 2019."

'Same address, 20 years later'

It wasn't until years later that anyone would think to pop it.

High Tech/Low Tech.

'I started whistling classic rock one day and now they won't leave.'

"Google says it's some form of ancient timing device."