Pre-marital Planning Gifts

'One thing I need clarified: if we marry in church, is there any point in a pre-nuptial agreement?'

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

"She can walk the walk, but can she talk the talk?"

"The amnio's fine, the sex is male, and the name is Wade."

Mr. & Mrs. Stickfigure are expecting twins.

'I'd like your permission to enter into pre-nuptial negotiations...'

"We balanced our budget this month!"

New arrival

"My wife tells me the bee has struck again!"

The Tunnel Of Love

"I wish they'd never discovered fertility drugs!"

"We've intended to ask you about it for some time, Doctor, but never got around to it."

Excess Baggage: Sooner or later all those vacation bills come due.

'If we respect each other, contraception makes sense!'

"Keep my fingers crossed! Is that it?"

Radiology, Cardiology and Fertility Clinic.

Preventive medicine.

"I'm so sorry that I screamed...I had a terrible dream: the kids had to leave college and live with us again...Oh, Ed, it was horrible!"

'OK...now what?'

"You need to stop pressing the snooze button on your biological clock."

'Let me get this clear. You want me to give you paternity leave before the baby is born.'

Lesbians for Christ

"We've gone old fashioned and decided against finding out the sex of my obstetrician."

"Have you considered trying for a puppy?"

'Darling, how romantic...a pre-nup.'

No wonder she's a blushing Bride"

'It's not that I don't want more kids Victoria, I'm worried I won't have enough skin for their names.'

Pregnancy Test

Family planning - 'I was thinking something low maintenance.'

'I'm pregnant, the dog and cat arepregnant,even the gold fish is pregnant - it beats me how you ever became a family planning counsellor...'

"I changed my mind – no more kids."

'Did you remember to bring a specimen?'

Fertility clinic open day - Man holding balloons shaped like sperm.

Children.