Pre-marital Planning Pillows

'One thing I need clarified: if we marry in church, is there any point in a pre-nuptial agreement?'

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

"She can walk the walk, but can she talk the talk?"

"The amnio's fine, the sex is male, and the name is Wade."

Mr. & Mrs. Stickfigure are expecting twins.

'I'd like your permission to enter into pre-nuptial negotiations...'

The Tunnel Of Love

New arrival

"We balanced our budget this month!"

"My wife tells me the bee has struck again!"

"I wish they'd never discovered fertility drugs!"

'If we respect each other, contraception makes sense!'

"We've intended to ask you about it for some time, Doctor, but never got around to it."

Excess Baggage: Sooner or later all those vacation bills come due.

"Keep my fingers crossed! Is that it?"

Radiology, Cardiology and Fertility Clinic.

Preventive medicine.

"You need to stop pressing the snooze button on your biological clock."

"Have you considered trying for a puppy?"

'Let me get this clear. You want me to give you paternity leave before the baby is born.'

"I'm so sorry that I screamed...I had a terrible dream: the kids had to leave college and live with us again...Oh, Ed, it was horrible!"

"We've gone old fashioned and decided against finding out the sex of my obstetrician."

'OK...now what?'

Lesbians for Christ

'Darling, how romantic...a pre-nup.'

No wonder she's a blushing Bride"

Pregnancy Test

Family planning - 'I was thinking something low maintenance.'

"I changed my mind – no more kids."

'I'm pregnant, the dog and cat arepregnant,even the gold fish is pregnant - it beats me how you ever became a family planning counsellor...'

Fertility clinic open day - Man holding balloons shaped like sperm.

'Did you remember to bring a specimen?'

Children.

'Normally I'd be strongly opposed to a womanh your age electing a permanent birth control option...but in your case-'