Postal Process Ponderer Gifts

The Ghost of Christmas Post - a floating postman appears from a man's bedroom wall, two months late delivering his Christmas mail.

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?"

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

Three work boxes: 'IN...LIMBO...OUT': 'I think I've found your bottleneck.'

'Okay, let the minutes show we're not absconding with the money until the economy improves...'

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

'Euro's down against the pound, dollars up against yen, pound is... what the hell don't expect cheap meals in France!'

How do you fell about buying your own health insurance?

'In other words, statistics prove that statisticians aren't always right.'

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

A sardine can combined with a cornucopia.

Are you aware? The Higgs Boson was thought to exist even through no one had seen it!

'Dang it, nothing but junk mail'

Doo inc..can and no can.

Desk bins: Pretend it's not here, Hope it goes away, Delegate it.

"I like office work, it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours!"

Document Filing in the Post-Literate Era.

'No, I'm not into astronomy. That telescope is for you to see your new parking spot.'

Dr. McPhee discovers the Embarrassment Particle.

"Crap in" and "crap out"

"Will you be passing a mailbox?"

"Just junk mail."

The mysterious world of ligand substitution

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

'Does he mean before or after the needs survey?'

'I proved that when you start to count your blessings, you find that they're infinite.'

'I just can't believe the amount of packaging there is these days.'

Six months later they would be sharing the Nobel Prize, but for now all they could do was stare in amazement at what they had discovered...two incredibly well preserved specimens from the styrofoam age.'

'It's an EIEIO!'

'Can I trust a Doctor whose prescriptions have absolutely no side effects?'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

In, out, and back in again trays