Processor Ponderer Gifts

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

"The UWS association for the advancement of A.I."

"What's an imagination? It was something kids used to enjoy before they invented video games."

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

'As you know, some of us can't keep up with the pace of new technology.'

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

'Our basic package is no frills, no chew toys, no extra Kibbles, and narry a pat on the head from management...'

Progress?

How do you fell about buying your own health insurance?

'In other words, statistics prove that statisticians aren't always right.'

"What's with kids nowadays? Walking upright's not good enough for you?"

"What if it's smarter than us?"

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

"Sure, but what have you invented lately?"

Keystone XL

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!!"

Are you aware? The Higgs Boson was thought to exist even through no one had seen it!

A sardine can combined with a cornucopia.

'U.S. Manufacturing'

"I appreciate you have a real passion for music Mr Hibberd. . . but I can see you're going to struggle with the piano."

"Well I think the Real question is..."

Robot Attack in Bath

'It's not working because it claims it can think and has decided not to.'

"Well, for starters, Matt has been showing definite improvement in risk-taking."

'Though we must innovate, and though we must grow, we must never lose sight of our core mediocrities.'

Dorothy finds the Yellow brick road is now a 6-lane expressway.

'No, I'm not into astronomy. That telescope is for you to see your new parking spot.'

CREEPY AF AI

'It seems like a good invention now, but someday there'll be millions of these things, all crashing into each other.'

'We could use more moving and shaking from you, Yomp, and less bobbing and weaving.'

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

Dr. McPhee discovers the Embarrassment Particle.

The mysterious world of ligand substitution

'Mind you, I'm not responsible for the entire pipeline ?' just the section that flows through my office.'