Portion Perceiver T-Shirts

'I knew there was a catch. Only fifty calories per serving but one small box contains eight servings.'

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"We've misjudged the tapas again."

All-Day Breakfast

"You know why they make these straws so big? It's a scam to make you drink fast so you can finish quicker and order more."

"The trouble is, professor, you see the Erlenmeyer flask half empty and I see it half full."

Looking at belt - "One more notch, room for desert."

Weight Loss Counselor, out for a 400 calorie lunch.

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

'I didn't choose art. Art chose me!'

Optimist, Pessimist, Surrealist.

'Special Delivery!'

"Do you have any books on perception?"

'How would you like your steak, sir?' - 'Big.'

"I fancy tall men."

"I'm Roberto, and I'll be your waiter this evening. This is Carl. He's in charge of portion control."

Fruits and vegetables

Go large or go home!

"Who had the Lumberjack fruit cup?"

'To help me stay on my diet, I've hired a portion control officer.'

Actually, it's healthier to eat smaller meals more often throughout the day.

"It is way too much food. That's why we charge way too much money."

'Hi, I'm Sheldon, and I want to speak to you about perception management!'

'I'll take THIS mirror.'

Berkeley Webcams

"That's not the real me."

People respond to their map of reality - NOT reality

Clothes Make the man...

'Which vacation destination do you prefer: a country where Americans are feared, idolized, envied or hated? Or shall we just let that be a surpriese?'

Things look better through rose-tinted glasses.

The Dinner Builiding

'Is it true what they say'

'This food is revolting. And such small portions.'

"I just paint what I see."