Poolside Performers Gifts

Aquarobics.

Bring your own inflatable.

"I love my new tie! I'll wear it to work tomorrow." "The report'll be done shortly." "Excellent!"

"Albert is the first whistler to use hearing aid feedback as an intro to one of his tunes."

Bankside

Man with a bad voice practices his singing thinking he is alone.

Man jumping into swimming pool with phone.

Dolphin tricks.

'Which end's the shallow end?'

Fully decked out in his new skimmer-Boy Mike was able to skim the pool in just 60 seconds,

'How did our ‘Get Away From It All' vacation turn into a ‘Take Most Of It With You' long weekend?'

Baldo's Life is Sweet Moment: When your new best friends down the street install a swimming pool.

No petting in the pool!

The vacation rental agency is saying technically that's a "lap pool," so we can't get our money back.

Tentacle attacking diver.

Get out of the kiddy pool Harold!

'Ha! Fake out!'

"Good news, your yacht club membership has arrived!"

'That would be way embarrassing.'

Swimming

An elderly couple arrive at Kiddie Pool Buffet, where people are wearing swim suits etc. and serving food from the pool itself.

'Don't press so hard, I almost drowned back there!'

Punch has a smoking break.

"Shake! Good dog."

"...You shouldn't by any chance be missing one of your animals?"

'Which is the deep end?'

'Synchronised swimming.'

'Get in the house now!'

'Is that a thong or is your rear end devouring your swimsuit?'

'...Where did you get all these piranhas?'

'What a RIP-off!'

'They're not a swimming aid - they're my feet !'

'Listen Jimmy, as a member of the School Swimming Squad, you're not taking your training seriously enough!'

'Bernie. You better have my ashtray by the time I get there!'

'And some sunshine.'